Crazy People Make Us Crazy – Day 1
May 22, 2017
“He’s making me crazy. I don’t understand. Why would someone say they were going to do one thing, then do something so different from what they say? He looks so good and talks so good. His promises sound so, so real, but then everything falls apart. I end up doing all this work, and he just disappears. I get so dang angry. Then about the time I’m ready to blow a gasket, he calls, charms my socks off, and the whole cycle starts over again. I walk away, scratching my head and wondering, ‘What’s wrong with me? Did I just imagine this whole thing? Did I overreact?’ I don’t get it. I don’t understand.”
Maybe it’s time for an Al-Anon meeting.
“And when we’re talking on the phone, I feel like I’m the only one for him. But then when I see him, I know he’s lying to me. I know he’s seeing someone else and standing there looking me right in the eyes and lying about it. When I ask him, he says, ‘Your insecurity is enchanting, and you’re usually such a together person.’ I don’t understand why I feel so insane.”
Maybe it’s time for an Al-Anon meeting.
“And then I catch him straight-out lying to me, and I blow up. I just can’t stand that lying stuff, especially when I knew all the time he was lying to me and he denied it. I put up with it and put up with it and then finally I can’t take it anymore. By the time I blow up, he’s standing there looking calm and serene and I’m acting like an insane person.”
Crazy people make us feel crazy. It’s not you. It’s him. How about that meeting?
“And then he calls a few days later, and he says how sorry he is and I can tell he’s sorry. Before I know it, I’ve forgotten about everything that happened, and it starts all over again. I keep wondering whether I’m being used, and then I look at him and I just feel so guilty for everything I’m feeling and thinking. Oh yeah. That Al-Anon meeting.”
Step One: Powerless over people, places, and things. My life has become unmanageable. Take a deep breath. Say it again. Then say it one more time. Crazy people make us feel crazy. It will happen every time.
Value: Detach in love. Disentangle. Un-embroil yourself from other people’s insanity so you can be restored to sanity. It’s a value many of us learned the hard way, and it’s the one we’ll focus on this week.
From the book: 52 Weeks of Conscious Contact
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About the author
In addiction and recovery circles, Melody Beattie is a household name. She is the best-selling author of numerous books.
One of Melody's more recent titles is The Grief Club, which was published in 2006. This inspirational book gives the reader an inside look at the miraculous phenomenon that occurs after loss--the being welcomed into a new "club" of sorts, a circle of people who have lived through similar grief and pain, whether it be the loss of a child, a spouse, a career, or even one's youth.
For more information about Melody and her books, visit the author's official website