Say when it’s time to stop sabotaging yourself

Jenny sat down in the comfortable armchair in the small, pleasantly lit office. The man sitting across from her looked like a normal, friendly man—not at all like she imagined a psychic would look. She relaxed and began to tell him why she was there.

“I don’t usually visit psychics, but I’d like some information and guidance about the relationship I’m in now,” she said. “The guy I’m seeing is a great guy. I’m really in love with him.”

The psychic didn’t have to be psychic to know that a “but” was coming next. He had heard the story many times before.

“But,” Jenny said, “he’s a drug dealer. But it’s only marijuana. And he doesn’t use himself. And he’s just doing it long enough to make enough money to start his own business. Go legitimate, you know.”

After rambling for a while, she stopped. “So,” she asked the physic, “what do you think?”

“You don’t need a psychic to tell you to get out as fast as you can,” he said, giving her money back. “It’s obvious. The relationship is doomed.”

As in Jenny’s situation, it’s easy to see the ridiculously obvious faulty thinking in our friends and people we’re close to. Sometimes it’s harder to see our own faulty thinking and blind spots.

“I love her, but she’s married.” “I love him, but he’s a cocaine addict.” “I love him, but I know he sleeps around a lot.”

While many people enjoy the benefits from seeking intuitive spiritual guidance at some time in their lives, there are many times we can easily tell our own future. Stop sabotaging yourself. Listen to what you’re saying. Listen to the but’s, to the words that come out of your own mouth. Yes, some drug dealers do reform. Yes, people recover from cocaine addiction every day. Yes, people with long histories of infidelity do stop sleeping around. And some married people do get divorced and marry those with whom they had affairs.

Some people win the lottery—every day. But more people never win the lottery.

Sometimes we’re blindsided by events that couldn’t possibly be foreseen. Sometimes it’s easy to predict trouble. Whenever possible, save yourself the pain and heartache inevitably coming around the bend.

Stop sabotaging yourself. Be your own psychic. Listen to what you’re saying, and give yourself the same basic advice you’d give to a friend. You may be the exception to the rule, but probably not.

God, help me let go of my blind spots, the ones that cause me to sabotage my own happiness and well-being.

From the book: More Language of Letting Go

The post Say when it’s time to stop sabotaging yourself appeared first on Melody Beattie.